


Emma and Ted’s most excellent adventure

by morganmulac



Category: The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals - Team StarKid
Genre: AU, France (Country), Gen, Heavy Angst, Paulkins - Freeform, Ted and Emma, cure au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-29
Updated: 2020-02-06
Packaged: 2020-03-26 18:29:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 5,041
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19011427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/morganmulac/pseuds/morganmulac
Summary: When the two most unlikely friends are forced to fend off the musical apocalypse they agree that they’ll get out of this mess, together.This is an AU of the guy who didn’t like musicals where Ted survives with Emma and drags her out of the Clivesdale hospital the second a note comes out Paul’s mouth.





	1. Getting away

“ ** _Emma I’m sorry… you loooost_** ” “Paul?” Ted felt the blood run out of his face, this couldn’t be happening, not to Paul, _he was supposed to save them_.

Without a second thought to it he grabbed Emma’s wrist and ran out of the building with her as quick as possible, he saw a nearby dumpster and hid the both of them behind there

“We can’t run off to Colorado, they’ll find us there for sure” Ted knew since Paul most likely had Emma and his files from Schaffer on hand, that they’d know where The two of them would be. 

“What about Guatemala? There’s an older lady I know that lives there that would probably let us stay with her” Ted quickly shoots it down “I heard you telling Paul about Guatemala, it’s a logical place to search for us”

 “we need to get out of the country at least for now, how about… France?” Ted continues, Emma nods quickly and they start running from the clivesdale hospital as quick as they can

In the meantime before getting to France they get as far from clivesdale as they possibly can, they hitchhike, they buy bikes just to use them for fifty miles and ditch them, they do everything to remain as off the grid as they can

Emma is able to find someone to get them new paperwork so it’s not Kelly and Brian (Ted’s new name from PEIP) flying to France, it’s Mandy and James going there instead

One month later they finally get to France and start to make lives for themselves a bit, never staying in one apartment for too long though, leaving as soon as their lease was up. And as rocky as a start to their friendship as they had, they had really bonded while being on the run

After they get all their new furniture in Ted makes some tea for himself and Emma and asks her to sit on the couch with him, They sit and drink their tea, for a few minutes it’s silent, but Ted breaks it by asking Emma to tell him about herself, the most he knows is what he overheard her telling Paul

“Well... I was raised Jewish, my favorite coffee is an iced mocha with four shots of espresso, though I prefer tea over coffee” Emma sound counting on her fingers for the first two and shaking her cup for the last fact

She then looked at him prompting him to share a few things too

“Alright then... my favorite color is navy... my favorite animal is a raccoon type thing called a Kudamundi..” Emma interrupted right after with roaring laughter “oh I hated those little demon creatures, they always got in my trash bins in Guatemala”

Ted starts laughing too “figures my favorite animal is one that caused you chaos”

“And... my favorite movie is The Notebook...” Ted finished a little sheepishly as Emma’s Jaw dropped “ _YOU_? The Notebook?? no way!!”

Ted started awkwardly laughing “yeah.. Charlotte showed it to me one night and I just really liked it”

They sat there mostly ignoring their tea and swapping small fun facts and stories about themselves, Emma’s first trip to Disneyland, Ted’s first trip out of the country, Emma’s first kiss. Neither of them really knew when they dozed off but they woke up at noon to their still half full tea cups and just relished in the night before, for just a few hours that night they forgot they were on the run from a musical apocalypse. 


	2. When life starts to settle

Ted and Emma slowly yet surely got into a groove of living in France, Ted got a stable job near the campus where Emma signed up for classes, that way they were always able to get to each other in a moments notice.

Emma always gets back a few hours earlier than Ted so she always gets dinner ready for them whether it was take out or actually cooking something. 

In a way they started to become each other’s rock, Ted always listens to Emma complain about the guy who will not stop clicking his pen that drives her absolutely nuts, he helps her out with work that he can see her struggling with. 

Emma listens to Ted complain about this one lady on a support call earlier who would not listen to him no matter what he said, she listens to him complain about his one coworker who is “such an outstanding jerk that I’m amazed he even has a job in customer service.”

“I’m like 80% sure that’s how Paul felt about you. “After she said Paul’s name there was such silence you could hear a pin drop, they tried to pretend most of the time that they weren’t running from him, but they couldn’t ignore it forever. 

Ted was the first to break the silence, “look Emma, I don’t know if or when they’ll find us, but I promise that I will die before I let any of them hurt you.”

“You would?”  
“Of course, look, over the past month of us living here you’ve become like one of my little sisters, I would never forgive myself if something happened to any of my sisters”  
“Believe me ted I know that feeling”

They spent that night making half serious, half joking plans of what they would do if the apotheosis would ever find them “move to Australia?” “Dude before you know it were just gonna play out the whole Animaniacs country song in where we move.” 

Over the next two months went about life as normal as they could, always making a point of having their tea night once a week. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A shorter chapter but I felt like this was a good point to end before the next chapter!  
> Just a warning there will be light angst in the next chapter!  
> Thanks for all the Kudos!!  
> Leave a comment below and let me know if you like this update!  
> ~ Morgan


	3. Midnight confession

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Light angst time!! Also little backstory for ted!

One of Emma’s classmates had asked her if she wanted to come with her to dinner that night, it was the first night since they moved in to their apartment that she wasn’t having dinner with Ted but they both agreed they can’t spend all their free time with each other, it’d probably drive them nuts if spent any more time together, She texted Ted letting him know that she’d probably be home late that night

When she got back around midnight she noticed it seemed more quiet than usual, she called out to see if Ted was still awake and she heard him mumble “kitchen” She walked over to their kitchen to see Ted balancing himself on the counter, he was quietly staring out their window,

“do you think it hurts?” “What hurts?” “When you’re infected, do you think they were in pain when they died?” It was a question she didn’t know the answer to and didn’t want to think about

Emma was about to ask what had him in such a mood to talk about... that, but was interrupted by Ted’s arm slipping off the counter and him almost smacking his head After a slight giggle she asked him if he wanted to go sit on the couch and he nodded weakly

“Ted.. are.. are you drunk?” Emma asked when she noticed the open bottle of whiskey on the counter whilst putting his arm around her to balance him since he was more stumbling to the couch than walking

“Maybe a little”  
“How much is a little”  
“Em, ‘mfine, I’m not drunk”

“Can I tell you something about me?” Ted asked breaking the five minute silence since they sat on the couch, though he didn’t bother waiting for a response

“Most of my family hates me, in addition to being the fucking black sheep of the family I also seem to be a disgrace to them because I’m bi, they made it very clear growing up that the second I turned 18 that I was going to get the hell out of their house as soon as possible, they made that more clear the day after my birthday by kicking me out”

Emma sat in silence as Ted continued to basically share his childhood with her, even though her parents never hated her as much as Ted’s seemed to hate him she knew how it felt, knowing you weren’t the favorite child of the family hurts and she did pity him

“So eventually I moved across the bridge to hatchetfield to live with a friend, enrolled in the community college and tried to make something of myself, it’s weird how little a person will try when they know they’ll never live up to their parents expectations of them, so I guess I kind of just ended up putting up walls to block people from ever getting close enough to me so they never could be disappointed in me.. anyways shortly after graduation I got the job at CCRP, things were going so-so, nobody in the office really liked me that much and Paul, the one guy I had feelings for since moving to Hatchetfield of course thought I was an ass..”

“And of course Charlotte, the one person in my life I’ve ever trusted and opened up to has to be taken away from me by the fucking aliens who we’ve now had to run to a totally different country to escape.. guess the universe just has something out for me ya know? Maybe I deserve this...”  
Ted got quiet as tears started to form in his eyes

He sat their leaning on Emma sobbing for a solid five minutes while she rubbed his back, she decided to speak once he started to calm down a little and his breathing evened out “hey.. honey, I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone push through this much I their lives without so much of a sign of struggle on the outside, you’re stronger than you can even know for living through this shit.. I’m so proud of you.” Emma knew it wasn’t much but she was hoping it would help even a little

“I’ve never needed that more than I do right about now.. thanks for being my sidekick, Em...” Ted said yawning right after

“Why don’t I go get a blanket and we turn on a movie? How about the notebook?”   
“That’d be nice”

When Emma got back to the couch Ted was out cold and snoring lightly

She couldn’t help but laugh slightly as she covered him up and grabbed an Advil for him for morning, heaven knows he’d need it

 

The next morning Ted woke up to a pounding headache and feeling like he was about to throw up, a few minutes minutes later Emma walked into the living room

“morning” Ted said sitting up so Emma had room to sit down “I feel like death” “no offense you look like it too” Emma laughed “ahhh I feel the love” “anytime, Marino” 

“So um.. what exactly happened last night” Ted knew he had gotten wasted, and he was worried about what he might’ve said to Emma

“Well I got home, you were drunk off your ass, so I threw you on the couch and threw a blanket on top of you”

Ted wasn’t thoroughly convinced that Emma was telling the whole story but decided to drop it because he wasn’t sure if he wanted to know what he had said

He had noticed over the next week or two though that Emma seemed a bit softer towards him, making less jabs at his expense, being a little more affectionate than usual, it confirmed in his head that he has said something he probably wouldn’t have wanted to Emma, but a part of him was thankful she didn’t bring it up. 


	4. joyeuses fêtes!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Holidays in France with Ted and Emma! (While Emma is Jewish in this AU she does celebrate the non-religious aspects of Christmas)

After Ted’s work Christmas party Emma and Ted came back to their apartment to watch some Christmas movies and chill

They were going to wait to give each other their gifts until Christmas morning but decided they both get to open 1 each that night

Ted picked out a medium box for himself to open, Emma picked out the smallest box on the top

Ted opened his first and almost fell of the couch laughing when he saw a hand painted mug saying “kick my head”

“Best. Gift. Ever”

"Nicola had invited me to paint mugs with her and some of the girls and I couldn't help myself"

Then when it was Emma’s turn Ted got quiet, he knew exactly which gift she was opening and he prayed to god she would like it

Emma opened up the wrapping as delicately as possible to see a small jewelry box, she looked up at ted who was gesturing her to take off the lid, she lifts the lid up to see a golden heart shaped necklace with a smaller heart shaped diamond in the middle 

She smiles and starts to thank Ted but is interrupted by him “it’s a locket, open it up”

When she opens up the locket she almost starts crying, it’s a photo of her and Jane from Emma’s graduation, “I thought it’d be a nice reminder of her since you can’t talk to her with us on the run and all", She still hadn’t told him the full story about Jane and the car crash, she wasn’t quite ready to. But a small gesture of having a photo of her meant everything to Emma, she was crying to hard to even choke out a thank you

Ted had gotten nervous by Emma’s reaction but was flooded with relief when she basically tackle hugged him and whispered a thank you

The next morning they opened the rest of their gifts, and then spent the whole day on the couch with hot cocoa and more Christmas movies than either of them could count

 

*timeskip to 6 days later... New Year’s Eve*

“So Em, what’s your New Years resolution?” Ted asked over the noise of the crowd “to never have to worry about you know what again, You?”

  
“Maybe get a hot little French girl to date me” he joked wiggling his eyebrows “you said resolution, not fantasies that’ll never come true”

Emma swears she saw Ted mouth “Well fuck you too Em” under his breath

* _five minutes to midnight_ *

“You gonna go find a hot guy to make out with Ted?” Emma’s held her breath as soon as the words left her mouth, she hadn’t talked to Ted about his.. drunken confession time last month

“....yeah, how’d you know?” Ted said after almost spitting out his drink to what Emma has said

She quickly excused herself to the bathroom in hopes that when she returned Ted would have forgotten about what she said

Thankfully Ted was so many drinks deep that when Emma returned two minutes later he had seemed to either forget about it or he decided to drop it, Emma hoped it was the former

* _one minute to midnight_ *

“To 2019 not being as musically as possible” ted had quietly announced with his shot glass in the air to himself and Emma “here here!” They both downed the drinks they had

* _10 seconds to midnight_ *  
“Hey Ted”  
* _7 seconds to midnight_ *  
“Yeah Em?”  
* _4 seconds to midnight_ *  
“Kiss me”  
“ _BONNE ANNÉE_ ”  
They heard the cheers around them as the clock struck midnight and they locked lips, they both knew that it wasn’t going to turn into anything, especially considering they were both drunker than they’d been in a long time, but they had each other to celebrate with and that’s what mattered most to them, not any relationships, not the looming threat of the apotheosis, the only thing that mattered was they were alive and next to each in that moment of time

The next morning they both laughed about their impromptu makeout session, with Ted earned a pillow tossed at his face by pretending to gag at the fact.  
All-in-all, they had high hopes for whatever was going to come their way in 2019, no matter what life will throw at them they’ll get through it. Together.


	5. St. Vitus’ dance

“Hey Ted, have you ever heard of St. Vitus's Dance?”  
“Yeah wasn’t it when people broke out into dance until they collapsed?”  
“Basically, we’re learning it in History, and it just seems so similar to..  _that_ , you know? I guess it’s just making me wonder if something like that has happened before”

Ted paused and raised an eyebrow “then why hasn’t the world always been a shitty musical since then, Emma?”   
“Well here’s the thing, the people were mostly making guess work in cures, what if someone actually found a cure for this, sure it wasn’t modern medicine but it still was something, imagine what you could make with modern day science”

“Are you saying... we make a cure?” Ted wasn’t quite sure is that’s what Emma was insinuating but figured to at least ask   
“I mean, Ted think logically, if and when they find us we could at least have some sort of weapon against them”  
“And what if this doesn’t cure them”  
“Best case, they die. Worst case.. we run for our lives”  
“Nah I think worst case is they turn into a worse mutant form, and then we really run for our lives” that comment earned both a laugh and a pillow to the face from Emma

“Seriously Ted, you in?”   
“Hey, it’s better than fending them off with our bare hands”

As the next two weeks went by Ted and Emma slowly but surely turned their third bedroom into a makeshift lab, and they started experimenting with different ideas, mainly written down ideas

“Ugh this would be so much easier if we actually had some of that blue shit”   
“And that would help us how?” Ted tried his best to be a good lab partner but when it comes to an alien pathogen and a journalist degree there’s only so much you can know  
“See Professor Hidgens was an infectious disease researcher before he started teaching, I remember him so clearly saying that you usually need a sample of whatever you’re trying to cure to figure out what can kill it, he also said it’s not impossible to figure out a cure without it, it’s just much more difficult when you don’t have it”

As much as she hated to admit it, she really enjoys the lab work that she’s doing

“You know, if you weren’t so intent on a pot farm you could probably make big bucks doing this.” Ted laughed but he was mostly serious, he could see her eyes light up whenever she was in their little apartment lab, he noticed her small smiles when she mixed two things and it did what she wanted it to, and he couldn’t help but find it sweet, if they had to find this stupid cure at least she had fun doing it, and Ted can’t complain about playing mad scientist either, he was having some fun too. 


	6. Still healing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warnings for this chapter:   
> Mentions of death   
> Mentions of drunk driving/drinking  
> (I think that’s all but please comment if I’ve had an oversight!)

Ted had noticed Emma seemed off all morning before class, wasn’t as sharp as she normally is, the little smile she got while she was working in their lab just wasn’t there

He wanted to inquire and see what was wrong but he knew Emma sometimes needed space more than anything some days, “it’s raining pretty hard outside, you need me to drive you to class?”  
Emma said no practically before the words came out of Ted’s mouth, Ted didn’t notice emma wince like she had been hurt when he asked

Ted came back from work to Emma staring blankly out the window “hey Em, you okay?” Emma didn’t respond so Ted walked over and sat down next to her, and it wasn’t until then that he saw her crying, “Emma, what’s wrong?” Ted was starting to get more concerned by the second, Emma just seemed numb to the world, he wished he would’ve asked before she left if everything was alright. That concern increased tenfold when Emma turned away from the window and just laid her head on Ted’s shoulder and sobbed

“Emma, I need you to tell me what’s wrong, I want to he-“  
“Two years ago today Jane was in a car crash and died.”  
“Em oh my god, I’m so-“  
“Can it, Ted, you’re sorry, Paul’s sorry, everyone is _sorry_ , unless you were the stupid asshole drunk driver that crashed her car, you have no reason to be sorry”

Ted opened his mouth to say something but nothing came out, he knew he was never good with words so anything he’d say would probably be useless, so he just hugged Emma tighter while she kept sobbing, “Hey! Listen, at least there’s a 50/50 chance the asshole either drank himself to death or got killed be singing aliens”

“Ted.”  
“What? I’m just saying! Look Emma, I know I’m awful with words and helping people and all that emotional shit, but I’m gonna be here with you as long as you need me to be, you’ll just have to put up with my awful and morbid jokes”  
“And you know I’ll always do the same Ted, morbid jokes and all”

“You want some hot cocoa? I know we normally go for tea but cocoa might make you feel a bit better” she looked up at him and nodded, as he was turning to walk to the kitchen he glance back and got a glimpse of Emma holding her locket “oh Em.. I-“ “the photo you got put in is the last one I had been in with Jane, it’s nice to have the little reminder that however far apart we are I still have her with me here” she pointed to the middle of the heart locket smiling lightly, “It’s the best gift I could’ve gotten Ted. I mean it”

Ted came back a few minutes later with their hot cocoa and they sat on the couch for heaven knows how long, Ted had cracked a few jokes that ended up getting a laugh out of Emma

They were on the fourth episode of a baking show they were watching when Ted looked down to see Emma out cold on his shoulder, he turned down the tv and went to get up to get Emma a different blanket but stopped when she grabbed his arm lightly, he decided to just cover them up with a blanket a few feet away.

That’s the first morning the day after the anniversary of Jane’s death that Emma woke up and smiled


	7. An old friend

The day had started out normal for Ted and Emma, they had woken up, made breakfast and chilled out until they both had to head to work and class respectively

Emma had this weird feeling all day that something was off, like someone was watching them, Ted had that same feeling that morning but had brushed it off as him not being quite awake yet “oh Em, before you get home from class can you stop off at the store and grab a few things? I would, but I got a late night at the office tonight”  
“Sure, I’ll just grab the list off the fridge and take it with me”

Emma’s friends at school had noticed she had seemed off as well, “oh come on Mandy, you said James was getting home late so what’s the problem with grabbing a few drinks with us? Heaven knows you need it” Emma rolled her eyes and knew she was probably worried for no actual good reason “ugh fine, but only a few, James never mentioned how late he was getting home so I don’t know if I’ll be home alone even after being out and I’d rather not be drunk”

Emma felt weird about using Ted’s cover name but she was starting to get used to it, making a jump from Ted and Emma, to Brian and Kelly, To James and Mandy in a matter of months was a rough transition for both of them but they were getting in the groove of it. “Yay!! Look, you just need to let your hair down and relax girl, what’s the worst that could happen?”

Right after class ended Emma remembered she had to grab a few things from the store “hey, Nicola!”  
“Yeah?”  
“I need to grab a few things from the store for me and James, can you just text me the address?”  
“Sure thing!”

Emma unlocked their apartment door about 30 minutes later, still not able to shake the feeling that someone was watching her

A few minutes later she got all her stuff ready and ran out the door to go head to the bar, Emma hadn’t noticed that she’d forgotten to lock the door on her way out

Emma got home around 10:30, she didn’t realize that she had a few more drinks than she had originally planned, so she wasn’t quite as steady on her feet as she could’ve been, she hadn’t noticed when she walked in through the door that it was still unlocked from earlier

When she walked into the living room she dropped her bag and went as pale as a ghost when she saw who was sitting on her and Ted’s couch

“.......... _no…not you_..”

“ _oh you better believe Emma darling_.”

 


	8. Chapter 8

“What are you doing here?”  
“You know exactly what I’m doing here dear”  
Emma stumbled back lightly, whether it was because of drunkenness or fear was anyone’s guess  
“Oh _honey_.. do you need some help?” Even though he faked concern in his voice he couldn’t help but laugh at Emma for the state she was in   
“Get… Get away from me” 

“Oh don’t be scared of me Emma, I’m here to help you”  
Emma’s mind felt foggy but she then remembered she had a syringe in her purse with what she hoped was a suitable cure  
“Oh our poor little Emma, drunkenly stumbling around mere moments before her death, I wonder how Ted would feel.. coming back.. realizing he couldn’t save you, and all because you couldn’t be a good little girl and stay sober while on her own”

“Leave him out of this”  
Emma lunged forward, syringe in hand, before he had a chance to respond  
“ _GET.. AWAY FROM ME_ ” before Emma could stick him with the syringe he had gotten a hold of her and had gotten the upper hand, which wasn’t hard considered he towered over her normally, he finally broke his grasp on her when she pushed her elbow back into his face and jamming him in the nose

Emma made a break to run in and lock herself in the bathroom but could hear him shuffling behind her trying to catch up  
“You can’t hide from me forever Emma"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ted was at work late when his boss pulled him out of a meeting to tell him his phone was buzzing non stop and that he probably needed to check it  
His heart started racing as he walked to his cubicle, there was only one reason he could think of why his phone was blowing up and it was a reason he prayed he’d never live to see  
he froze when he picked up his phone and saw the notifications on it

He scrolled down

**Emma**   
**Missed call (4)**

 

He ran to his bosses office   
“I have to get home, it’s a... family emergency” his boss nodded and he bolted out of the building as fast as his legs could take him  
Their apartment was only a mile away from where ted worked but the run couldn’t seem to feel any slower to him, every time he started to slow down and feel out of breath he kept pushing because he knew if he stopped he’d be too late for her, he _couldn’t_ be too late for her

  
As he quietly opened their apartment door he could hear a familiar voice singing _oh god this wasn’t a bad dream, he’s here._  
Ted stepped as lightly as possible so Paul couldn’t hear him, and grabbed the closest thing to him that resembled a weapon, which happened to be a frying pan and slowly made his way towards the hall that Paul was in.

 

Emma clutched onto her locket from ted and the syringe with their makeshift potential cure in her hand if only she had gotten closer to him to inject the cure, if only she had one less drink earlier, now she’s sitting on the bathroom floor praying that Paul doesn’t get in  
“ _ **Emma don’t you want to be with me?**_ " Paul sang in the same tune as he did from the hospital she wanted to turn and vomit into the toilet but was scared to make any noise.

  
“Think Emma, you can be happy, don’t you want that? You could finally be with Jane again, wouldn’t that make you happy” Paul said, his voice lowering lightly, almost sounding like the Paul that Emma knew, she wanted to stay back as far as possible but the thought of Jane, the thought of finally being with her again made Emma scoot a bit closer, she then shook that thought as quickly as it came to her  
“ _You motherfucker_ ”Emma heard the hall table shift “Stay the _fuck_ away from her” Ted’s voice was low and threatening, oh god..... _Ted_

 

She saw the silhouette of feet that had been at the door for the past fifteen minutes start to move away, Emma’s heart starting racing when she thought back to what ted had told her that night a month after they moved into the apartment “y _ou’ve become like one of my little sisters, I would never forgive myself if something happened to any of my sisters_ ”

  
Emma started shaking worse when she heard crashing from the hall, groans of pain from both ted and Paul alike, “Ted... I know you don’t want to fight me.. how do you think your poor parents would feel if they saw you now? their disgrace of a son, always destined for failure,  fighting a poor _innocent_ man... a man _you_ once _loved_.” Emma heard Ted’s breath hitch and then the crashing started again

 

 

After another few minutes of fighting Emma heard a thud on the ground and a string of whispered curses.. from Ted  
“ _i will die before I let any of them hurt you_ ” Emma started sobbing into her knees, no.. not ted. Emma knew he made good on his promise to her, he died trying to protect her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for the hiatus everyone - but I'm back with this!

**Author's Note:**

> General notes for this Fanfic:  
> Anything in italics AND in bold is sung, if it’s just italics or just bold it’s not being sung.  
> Ted’s last name in this AU is Marino, I’m aware this is not canon but I feel like the name fits him so that’s what I’m sticking with.  
> There will be quite a few angsty chapters but there will also be chapters with so much fluff you’ll fall over.  
> And lastly! There are a few chapters I will already have trigger warnings on but PLEASE comment if you need me to put a trigger warning on any part of a chapter or the chapter as a whole! With that in mind hope you enjoy the FanFic!  
> ~ Morgan


End file.
